In this episode, we discuss how you can’t rely on your role models for everything.
Full Transcript
Hi Everyone, welcome to the You’re Daily Cup of Joe Podcast, with your host Joe Bautista. In this podcast, my goal is to give you quick lessons that you can reflect on in your journal so you can grow yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually and have a better career, better relationships, and better personal finances while you enjoy your morning cup of coffee.
I’m also the author of the book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to Get Better Every Day”. In this book, I wrote down over 30 tips to help you grow in those four cornerstones. I’m also the founder of Grow With Joe, where I combine self-development coaching and financial planning for Latino Professionals.
At the end of today’s podcast episode, I’m going to give you a prompt question to reflect on in your journal. The idea is to take one to five minutes to reflect on today’s lesson and write a minimum of one paragraph on how you can apply the lesson in your life life. You can use an actual journal, a word document like on Google Drive, or your note-taking app like Evernote. The idea is that you’re actually thinking about how to process the information to help you improve your life.
In today’s episode, we’re are going to talk about how role models are only of limited use. Role models are good to show that things are possible but they are not going to get you to the destination where you want to go. I feel like role models are good for giving you hope, but hope alone is a bad strategy to help you reach your goals. For myself, I don’t have a lot of role models. As I think back to my childhood, I guess I am just trying to become successful so that I don’t have to struggle. My parents were two blue-collar workers and I saw that money could be stressful at times. My motivation was just to get a good job with a good salary as a kid. I don’t remember seeing that many role models growing up in my small town. I just knew that if I did good in school and stayed out of trouble, then that would get me where I wanted to go in life. Then I went into the Marines because I was told they were the best branch out there and a third of fortune 500 CEOs were Marine Corps veterans, which was a lie. I just follow success, I don’t particularly have a role model.
If I know that 80% of this successful group does this particular thing, then I’m going to do that thing. A role model is just one person and there could be a million different factors that made that one person successful. If I look at a group as a whole, then I can get a clearer picture. I might see someone that I want to be like but then I like to look at different factors that made that person successful and see if a larger group of people are doing it. I can’t have a role model like Warren Buffett or Steve Jobs, because they grew up in very unique circumstances that they only can have. There are things that I can use from their life, but I have to make those things my own.
Then I have to start taking some type of action. I can be really into design like Steve Jobs and use that in my life, but then I need to actually start focusing on product design and making it my own. If I want to do valuations like Warren Buffett, then I need to do some of the things Warren Buffett does with his valuation analysis. I read Warren Buffett’s and Steve Job’s biographies and I learned a lot from them, but I don’t really want to be like them, I just want to take sections of their wisdom to make my life better. That’s why I’m doing with Grow With Joe, I just see who is doing what, then I ask myself, how can I implement this thing in my life or business.
I got the idea for The Daily Cup Of Joe because someone said I should do a podcast, and I really loved the Daily Stoic, so I decided to create my own podcast based on the Daily Stoic, and The Daily Stoic got this idea from those daily prayer books, I think. The thought a day, not something new. I really like Ryan Holiday and Robert Greene, I model my writing style after them, but I have to make it my own. I can’t just copy their stuff, I got to figure out how it can supplement my own things that I’m working on.
I can have Ryan Holiday, Robert Greene, and other people as role models, but they are never going to help me get to their level. I have to do the work on my own. They are guides but not carriers. I have to figure out the work on my own ultimately. I could get a spark of inspiration from them, but then it’s up to me to keep that fire going. I don’t idolize anyone since I know everyone is just human. No one is perfect, they have their own weaknesses and strengths. After reading the biography of Buffett and Jobs, they focused on their careers more than their family life at times. Jobs had a daughter that he really didn’t acknowledge when she was first born and they had a rocky relationship for a lot of their life. Is that something I want to role model after, no but there are things of Steve Job’s life that I do.
Since people are fallible, if I idolize them, then I feel like I would let their faults slide. If someone does something bad, I don’t want to have like I have to support them because they did something horrible. So don’t put your role models on a pedestal because they might let you down one day. Just see them as a person with faults and strengths, and you can learn from both. Just focus on your goals and the type of person you want to be. But to be the person you want to be is going to take action, so start taking some action today.
That’s it for today’s episode, and to summarize it, role models are only of limited use. You can use them as a guide but don’t be reliant on them. You have to live your own life and your life is going to be unique from everyone else on this planet. I think it is best to use role models as a direction of where you go, but it won’t be the same path. You have to live your own life, so what are you going to do today or this week to help you live your own life.
So in your journal, ask yourself, Am I over-relying on someone too much that is preventing me from making my own decisions? What can I do to help me start living my own life? If you don’t have a role model, ask yourself who is someone that I would like to have a similar life like? What is one idea that you can implement in your life to make your life better? Write these ideas down in one or two paragraphs and just reflect on them. Take five minutes to think about your answer and write your thoughts in the journal. Reflection is going to tell you where you need to go in life so make sure you take time to do so.
Thanks for listening today! To get a free copy of my book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to get better every day” just go to my website growwithjoe.me/book and just pay for shipping and handling.
I have a quiz on my website that grades your inner circle, so if you want to find out if your inner circle is an A, B, C, D, or F, you can take that quiz at growwithjoe.me/quiz
I’m also trying to do a feedback Friday episode, so if you have a question that you would like to have my answer on the air, just e-mail me at [email protected]
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Thanks for joining me today and remember if you go with Joe, you can grow with Joe, cause Joe knows Dough.
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