In this episode, I discuss ways you can stay in control of your life.
Full Transcript
Hi Everyone, welcome to the You’re Daily Cup of Joe Podcast, with your host Joe Bautista, where my goal is to give you quick lessons on how to grow yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually so you can have better careers, better relationships, and better personal finances.
I’m also the author of the book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to Get Better Every Day”. In this book, I wrote down over 30 tips to help you grow in those four cornerstones.
In today’s episode, we’re are going to talk about how to stay in control with your life. A great way to start getting control over your life is two write the things you can control on one piece of paper and on the other piece of paper, write down the things that you can’t control. Then with that piece of paper of things that you can’t control, just toss in the trash or burn it, the key thing is not to focus on those things.
By focusing on the things you can’t control, what you’re doing is giving away all your power. Every second that you think about it is a second that you can’t get back and you’re wasting valuable brain glucose for other decisions in your day.
Writing things down the things that you can’t control is a very powerful exercise. It makes you realize that you can’t control the outcome of those things and that you start to focus on the things that you can control.
You can control how you react to a certain thing, you can control if you smile or not, you can control your attitude about things, you control what type of media you consume. Basically you can control all internal things with your mind and your choices, but you can’t control the external things in life.
So if you want to start having control over your life, focus on the things you can control over your life. You can’t control your job, you can’t control your family, and you can’t control nature. Sometimes things go wrong in those areas, and that’s is what was supposed to happen. Now that it happens, just deal with the aftermath and move on with your life.
One of the quickest ways to be disappointed is to put your happiness in something out of your control. If you have to get all your happiness from your job or people, then you will get disappointed. It’s okay to get some on your happiness from those things but don’t make it the majority. You have the choice to enjoy where you are in life right now. Right now, I’m trying to grow my own business with coaching and I’m living with my parents in the same town I grew up in. Business is hard but I’m enjoying where I am in life right now because I’m doing what I want to do in life. I feel if I continue down the path, I will create the type of impact I want to see in this world.
I can’t control other people or outcomes, but I can control my actions. And the more I write, the more videos I make, and the more podcasts that I make will just give me more opportunities to get what I want out of life. I feel like life is a contact sport, the more contacts you’re able to make with people, the best off you’re going to be. You can’t control outcomes, but you can control inputs.
The difference between a musician and a rock star is PR. The musician that is going to do the most PR, is going to get the most attention. Personally, for me, I would find that exhausting but the more interviews, the more shows, and the more content they put out, the more they are going to get the attention of others. The squeaky wheel gets the oil. No one is really going to notice your work in a big environment. In a small environment, yes, but in a big environment, you have to make a lot of noise to get attention.
So don’t get mad at the outcomes, just put your head down and get back to work. You should take joy in the craft. Every paper you write, every shot you practice, is just what you’re supposed to do as a person and that’s taking action. If you’re unhappy with not getting on a date. Ask more people out or go out on more dates. It might be exhausting but it’s the only way you’re going to find the right person.
It’s very enlightening to only focus on the things that I can control. I don’t get mad when things don’t go my way. I just say okay, what can I do next to get closer to where I want to go in life, and then I go down that path. If that doesn’t work, then I try another path. That’s how I stay in control of my life. If I focus on the things that I can’t control, then I wouldn’t try again.
Just focus on what you can control and that is basically all you can do in life. There are tons of things in this life that are unfair but if all you do is focus on them, then it’s a very miserable feeling. I hate reading or watching the news because it’s too negative and it’s negativity that I can’t control. If someone is shot, it is a travesty but I can’t bring that person back to life. What I can do is, just save my slice of the world to make the world a better place. If that slice is to help out that family, then so be it but realize that you can’t save the whole world. The world has too many problems for one person to handle so focus on what part of the world you want to save. I want to help people believe that where they are in life, is not who they are going to be for the rest of their lives and to help them save their slice of the world.
Also, don’t give up your control to others or things. If you buy nothing but luxury items, make sure that it’s not to impress other people but because you want it and value it. This is very subjective but if you give your control to outside forces, you’re just becoming a slave under your own free will and that’s dangerous. We can become slaves to our jobs, to other people, and that things we chase, and it can turn out very ugly for us because those outside forces don’t care about you and won’t save you when times get tough. So take back your power and focus on the things you can control. Happiness doesn’t take much, it just takes having the right attitude about things.
Thanks for listening to today’s episode, to summarize it, focus on the things you can control and ignore the things you can’t control to the best of your ability. And if you suck at ignoring the things you can’t control, work at it and you’ll become a much happier person.
To get a free copy of my book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to get better every day” just go to my website growwithjoe.me/book and just pay for shipping and handling.
I have a quiz on my website that grades your inner circle, so if you want to find out if your inner circle is an A, B, C, D, or F, you can take that quiz at growwithjoe.me/quiz
I’m also trying to do a feedback Friday episode, so if you have a question that you would like to have my answer on the air, just e-mail me at [email protected]
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Thanks for joining me today and remember if you go with Joe, you can grow with Joe, cause Joe knows Dough.
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