In this episode, we discuss how you shouldn’t allow hesitation in your life.
Full Transcript
Hi Everyone, welcome to the You’re Daily Cup of Joe Podcast, with your host Joe Bautista, where my goal is to give you quick lessons on how to grow yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually so you can have better careers, better relationships, and better personal finances.
I’m also the author of the book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to Get Better Every Day”. In this book, I wrote down over 30 tips to help you grow in those four cornerstones. I’m also the founder of Grow With Joe, a company that combines financial planning with self-development coaching for Latino professionals.
In the today’s episode we’re are going to talk about how hesitation is your enemy. If you play a sport and you hesitate, you’re either going to injure yourself or you’re going to mess up the play and it’s not going to go well for you.
Hesitating in most areas of yours is not a good idea but we do it all the time. When it comes to business, we want to avoid doing those hard things because they’re not going to be fun to do or we are worried about the rejection.
In dating, we hesitate on asking someone out because we are afraid of rejection.
In school, we hesitate on doing our homework because we’re not ready to go through the pain of writing a paper or reading that textbook.
You have to realize that hesitation is your enemy. It holds you back from the type of person you want to become. If you’re dating or in business, you have to realize that it’s a game of numbers, the more contacts you have the better offer you’re going to be. It sucks to be rejected but you need to go through those rejections to get to your goal.
If you study a lot of successful people, you will understand that they all go through rejection. Warren Buffett, was rejected from going to Harvard Business school and he was rejected from working under his mentor Benjamin Graham, but he persisted until he said yes.
I hesitated when I started this podcast because I was worried that it wasn’t going to be good enough but I had some people reach out to me and say that they liked the podcast. So I’m going to keep doing it because if I can inspire a few people to take action to become better versions of themselves, then I’m doing my part to save my slice of the world.
I rank pretty high on execution but I still hesitate from time to time because I’m worried what’s going to happen as an outcome. But when I think about it, it’s like ripping off a band-aid, it stings a little bit but in the end, I’ll be able to heal from it and become stronger from going through that experience.
So for some tips to help you get over hesitation, is to have a countdown. Usually, you give yourself three seconds and then you have to do whatever you had your mindset on what you wanted to do. I remember, I was in Hawaii and there was this 35-foot cliff to jump off into a pool of water. It’s on my Instagram but it took me a while to build up the courage to jump. I was just getting in my head and letting fear take over. I was there alone initially but then this couple came up and they were scared too. So I decided that I would just jump because I didn’t want them to jump before I did. And I just counted to three and I jumped. It was fun and I survived. I’ve done all similar jumps in the past but it always gets me.
So if you want to do something, like have a difficult conversation, go talk to someone at the bar or at a networking event, or to jump off a cliff, give yourself a countdown and then take action. The longer you wait, the longer you increase the likelihood of not doing the activity. There have been so many girls in the past that I decided not to talk to because I hesitated and then it got into my head that it was ok not to go.
You don’t know what kind of life you can live if you always hesitate. You might talk to someone and they might provide you the opportunity of a lifetime. You might go to a networking event, and get a new idea to implement in your life that will change how you work for the rest of your life. You can’t get these types of opportunities if you hesitate.
I’m trying to be better with the hesitation but it’s still an issue but I’m much better than how I was in the past. A lot of this has to deal with me being overweight, but as I said, I’m a lot better. People can’t believe how much sociable I am now than I was in high school. And it’s because I worked on myself.
Another way to get over your hesitation is just to get enough exposure to the thing. If you’re at a networking event and make it a habit to talk to five new people every time you go to an event after you talk to like 30 new people you will see that it’s not that bad. If you jump off enough 35-foot cliffs, you will realize that it’s not that bad. If you talk to enough people at the bar and don’t expect anything but a friendly conversation, then it will get easier. I know I make it a point to try to make people laugh when I’m out. One it’s going to sharpen my communication skills and two, it’s going to make somebody else’s day better. We only laugh like 8 times a day as an adult and we need to increase that amount. So I’m trying to make the world a little bit brighter when I can.
Try to get as many reps as you can if you can do the full thing, then try setting the bar lower. Instead of jumping off a 35 ft cliff into a pool of water, try 5ft then 10ft and work your way up. If you go to a networking event, make it a goal to talk to one new person. When Tony Robbins wanted to improve the marksmanship of our military, he had them start to shoot the target at 5ft away or something like that, and once they perfected that distance, they increased the distance by a little bit and kept going until they reached their desired distance. So here is another way to get over resistance. I used this technique when it came to making phone calls for my business. I started with five a day and I just increased from there.
Thanks for listening to today’s episode, to summarize it, you have to know that hesitation is your enemy. Your hesitation is causing you to not become the person you want to become in life and that is one of the greatest tragedies in our life is not being the person we were meant to be. And to get over your hesitation, try the countdown method and exposure therapy. If you having bigger issues, then I would recommend you go see a professional.
To get a free copy of my book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to get better every day” just go to my website growwithjoe.me/book and just pay for shipping and handling.
I have a quiz on my website that grades your inner circle, so if you want to find out if your inner circle is an A, B, C, D, or F, you can take that quiz at growwithjoe.me/quiz
I’m also trying to do a feedback Friday episode, so if you have a question that you would like to have my answer on the air, just e-mail me at [email protected]
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Thanks for joining me today and remember if you go with Joe, you can grow with Joe, cause Joe knows Dough.
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