In this episode, we discuss how worrying about what happened in the past is wasteful, and how to move forward with your life.
Full Transcript
Hi Everyone, welcome to the You’re Daily Cup of Joe Podcast, with your host Joe Bautista. In this podcast, my goal is to give you quick lessons on how to grow yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually so you can have better careers, better relationships, and better personal finances.
I’m also the author of the book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to Get Better Every Day”. In this book, I wrote down over 30 tips to help you grow in those four cornerstones. I’m also the founder of Grow With Joe, where I combine self-development coaching and financial planning for Latino Professionals.
In today’s episode, we’re are going to talk about how worrying causes you to live through misery twice. I used to think about the past a lot and how this should have happened or that I wished that this would have happened, but a majority of that thinking was wasteful. I also don’t like to worry because, for the majority of the time, it is wasteful. I just try to focus on what I can control and let everything else go. I like to thank the Stoic philosophy for giving me this mindset so I can focus my energy on things that matter.
If something happened in the past, and you’re still worried about it, it’s really not doing you any good. You’re just living through the misery twice and why would we want to do that to ourselves. We got to learn to let things go and just move on with our lives. I bombed in front of the crowd doing public speaking before and I keep worrying about my performance in the future, then I’m going to fail. I have to believe when I step on that stage, that I’m going to do a great job. If I hope that I’m going to do a great job, then I’m going to fail. I learned this valuable lesson from Russell Brunson in his podcast, Marketing Secrets where he learned that lessoned from Dan Gable, the greatest US Olympic Wrestler of all time.
When Dan Gable was a coach, he wouldn’t allow his wrestler to step on the mat unless they believed they were going to win. If you’re still worried about what happened in the past, you won’t be successful in the future. That misery is going to hold you back from your full potential. You got to be like Elza and just learn to let it go. I find it is easy to look back on things and analyze where I could have done better and how I can prepare to do better in the future. When I do this, there is no worry for worry in my brain, and I’m able to focus on things that actually matter.
Every second spent on worrying is a second that can’t get back. It is okay to worry when things actually happening right now. If someone is sick or if you see a friend or family member, you can worry about them, but if you do this, make sure it’s productive. Lend out a hand and see if they take, if they don’t, then try to get back to your life. You can worry about other things happening in the world, but make sure you’re doing something about it. If you can’t do anything about, move on. With the Amazon Rain Forrest being on fire, donate some money to it and stop eating meat. If you can’t do this, then why are you worried about it? It’s not going to be helpful.
If you’re worried that your current actions are not working out, maybe you just need to take a quick break and keep going or you need to find something else that would be more beneficial to work on. When it comes to my business, I worry about my actions and if this will be successful, but I just tell myself that it is better to fail in freedom than to succeed in chains. Right now, I’m not in a relationship and I don’t have any kids so I don’t have that many responsibilities. So if I do fail and go bankrupt, it won’t be that bad. I’m already living with my parents so I have a place to sleep and eat, and I just get rid of all my debt and start again. If Donald Trump can claim bankruptcy on his businesses, then I can do so as well. Walt Disney also claimed bankruptcy multiple times. The key thing is that you just keep moving forward with your dream and try again. That is what’s great about America, is that you can have a redo. The wrong type of bankruptcy is the excessive consumption type where you’re not growing, but if some health scare or opportunity that you were trying for didn’t work out, then you can try again.
I know this is true and I still worry from time to time but I just try to get out of that mindset as fast as possible. I feel a really good way to help with this is meditation. When I meditate, ideas come to my head, my when that happens, my goal is to recognize that idea, push aside and focus back on breathing. The goal is to focus on your breathing as much possible with the least amount of ideas popping in. This takes training but it is super helpful when you address the worrying that it is happening and push it aside so you can focus on productive action. The faster you can do this, the faster you can move on with your life and who wants to live in misery longer than they have to? No one does, duh.
That’s it for today’s episode, to summarize it, worrying causes us to live through misery twice. If I lived through misery once, I sure don’t want to live through it a second time. Plus we are not perfect people and we will make mistakes. So learn from them and try to the best of your ability to learn from them and sometimes bad things just happen, but we can’t let worrying about it happening again prevent us from living our lives. Live a life full of action and acceptance so you don’t have time to worry twice.
To get a free copy of my book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to get better every day” just go to my website growwithjoe.me/book and just pay for shipping and handling.
I have a quiz on my website that grades your inner circle, so if you want to find out if your inner circle is an A, B, C, D, or F, you can take that quiz at growwithjoe.me/quiz
I’m also trying to do a feedback Friday episode, so if you have a question that you would like to have my answer on the air, just e-mail me at [email protected]
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Thanks for joining me today and remember if you go with Joe, you can grow with Joe, cause Joe knows Dough.
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