In this episode, we discuss that you need to give value first before you ask for what you want.
Full Transcripts
Hi Everyone, welcome to the You’re Daily Cup of Joe Podcast, with your host Joe Bautista. In this podcast, my goal is to give you quick lessons on how to grow yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually so you can have better careers, better relationships, and better personal finances.
I’m also the author of the book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to Get Better Every Day”. In this book, I wrote down over 30 tips to help you grow in those four cornerstones. I’m also the founder of Grow With Joe, where I combine self-development coaching and financial planning for Latino Professionals.
In the today’s episode, we’re are going to talk about the concept of jab, jab, hook, which I got from Gary V. This is also a boxing concept where you do two quick jabs to your opponent’s face or body, so they expose a weaker part of their body for the hard landing hook.
Gary applied this concept to business where you don’t go for the sale right away, you give away some free content a couple of times before you ask for the sale.
This concept can be applied to dating and in a lot of other concepts.
In business or at work, you can ask for two things that you someone won’t agree to, but after saying no too many times, they will say yes to the lesser request.
For example, say you want to work on a new project, but your boss skeptical, first you would ask to do something with a lot more responsibility, then they would say no, then you follow it up with another request to work on something else that the boss will say no to. Then you follow up that no with the real request that you want.
This is the concept and it might not work perfectly but it’s a way to soften up your boss so you get a yes. Then once you get that yes, then you ensure that your work is up to your boss’s standard or else you won’t get another chance.
You also might get what you asked for on that first try so you just have to make sure that you’re ready to take whatever opportunity that comes your way.
When it comes to dating, you can go up to someone and ask them out and you might get what you want. But if you approach it in the same manner of jab, jab, hook, that might work out better for you. You can first ask them a question or make an observation, then you can follow it up with something funny to show that you’re a good person, and then you can ask for the digits. This hole jab, jab, hook concept is about trust.
You want the other person to trust you before you ask for the big commitment. For me and financial planning, it usually requires a big commitment from the other side is a reason why I do all these podcasts because I want other people to trust me before I ask for the business. So I wrote a book, I do this podcast, and I also write blog posts. It’s a lot of work but trust is something that doesn’t come cheap. If you go against someone and their trust, it will take a lot of work to get that trust back since it goes back to that saying, “How you do anything, is how you do everything.”
If I can trust you enough to consume your content and I find the value out of it, then I’m sure I’ll get value out of the bigger ticketed item. For me, before I buy something major from someone, I spend a lot of time to research and consume the free content before I indulge in a bigger priced item. I’m taking all the jabs and either I was exposing myself to the hook or I will be able to block it if I don’t like it.
Then once you get your hook in, then you have to start the process all over again. When I give my financial plans, then I have to follow-up with progress meetings to make sure that people are reaching their goals and providing other value so that when the contract is up, they will resign with me.
It’s not a one-time thing, and you win forever, it’s a constant flow of providing jabs, with the occasional hook. Once you stop jabbing, then you’re going to start to fall behind, and then once you go for the hook, you’ll most likely miss and lose the fight.
If you always go for the hay-maker, you might get lucky once, but after enough rounds, you will get knocked out or lose the fight. You can only use brute force at select moments. The other 99 percent of the time, you need to use the jab, jab hook method.
In life, if you constantly provide nuggets of value, then you make it far in life. It can be easy as saying hi to someone and asking about their day or making them laugh at some point. If I go to a coffee shop or somewhere, I just ask the person’s name or thank them by their name, and then try to figure out how to make them laugh or smile. I think taking an improv class is great for this because one of the concepts in improv is to make the other person look good and to say yes, and. So if you keep this concept close to heart, you’ll be able to provide the jabs needed to set up the hook, and you don’t always for be looking for a hook, you just want to make sure that it’s available when needed.
If I make sure that I’m taking care of my employees and clients with nuggets of value and then I get into a bind, then I can call in a favor. I won’t be able to call in a favor if I don’t set it up correctly. Then you’ll just be seen as a taker and you probably won’t get the help that you desire.
If everybody did this, then the world would be a better place. As a person, I want to receive the jabs or the nuggets of value because it will make me feel good. If I go into a restaurant or a store, I don’t want to feel I’m being forced into something, I want to be seduced. To feel good about the direction I’m going in and that it mostly my choice, even though I know there are outside forces that causing me to make certain choices. When a jab, jab, hook works on me, it works, when it doesn’t, then I just block it and go on with my life.
That’s it for today’s episode, and to summarize it, if you want to start getting more yeses in your life, then understand the concept of jab, jab, hook. This will ensure that you lower objections and hesitation from the other part when you go for your big yes. You can also check out Gary Vaynerchuk’s book Jab, Jab, Hook if you want more information on this concept and a link will be in the show notes at growwithjoe.me/episode174.
Thanks for listening today! To get a free copy of my book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to get better every day” just go to my website growwithjoe.me/book and just pay for shipping and handling.
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