In this episode, we discuss how you need to grow your emotional self so that when you get attacked by life, you’ll be strong enough not to be captured by life.
Full Transcript
Hi Everyone, welcome to the You’re Daily Cup of Joe Podcast, with your host Joe Bautista. In this podcast, my goal is to give you quick lessons that you can reflect on in your journal so you can grow yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually and have a better career, better relationships, and better personal finances while you enjoy your morning cup of coffee.
I’m also the author of the book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to Get Better Every Day”. In this book, I wrote down over 30 tips to help you grow in those four cornerstones. I’m also the founder of Grow With Joe, where I combine self-development coaching and financial planning for Latino Professionals.
At the end of today’s podcast episode, I’m going to give you a prompt question to reflect on in your journal. The idea is to take one to five minutes to reflect on today’s lesson and write a minimum of one paragraph on how you can apply the lesson in your life life. You can use an actual journal, a word document like on Google Drive, or your note-taking app like Evernote. The idea is that you’re actually thinking about how to process the information to help you improve your life.
In today’s episode, we’re are going to talk about how we need to prepare our body and our minds to be attacked but be strong enough not to get captured. In life, we are constantly being attacked by something. Usually, this means that things are not matching up to our expectations or something coming out of the blue to wreck our day.
We should expect these things to happen since the world is not perfect. If you expect other people to be rude and not match your expectations, then you can’t get disappointed since that is already you expected.
You can also get sick or something that has can break, but you need to be able to recover from those things. I was ready the daily stoic and on Nov 22, the title of the lesson is called “The Glass Is Already Broken” where a zen master kept saying a glass piece was already broken as he showed it to visitors. Then when the glass broke one day, he said, “Of course.”
The key thing is you don’t avoid doing or getting things, you enjoy them for as much as you can until you can’t anymore. Then if the glass breaks, then you go out and get a new one. The stoic philosophy is all about preparing for the worst but enjoying the day by doing important things. Your favorite glass could break and to prevent it from breaking you could just keep it locked up but then visitors wouldn’t be able to enjoy it.
In Japan, they have a form of art called Kintsugi. See the Japanese see that chips and dents on something are something that you should value because it shows that it is useful. So in Kintsugi, some artist break vases and other things and then glue it back together using gold. Showing that broken things are not something to hide but to show with pride.
When you get your scars from being attacked physically, emotionally, and mentally, we can use those past battles to make use stronger in the future and not be completely destroyed by future attacks.
The daily stoic does a really good job of helping you prepare emotionally for the attacks that are going to come. I would highly recommend you check out the book the Daily Stoic and sign up for the newsletter. Every day I just learn new tips like the glass is already broken that I can implement in my life and make me better.
It’s really just getting emotionally stronger as a person. And sometimes you just need to go through the experience to get emotionally stronger. I felt that I wasn’t that emotionally strong before the Marines, and going through the stress of boot camp helped me become better. Going through heartbreak and a failed business also helped me out. Because after enough time passes by, you realize that things were not that bad.
If you go into battle, you want to be tested, you don’t want to go into a very serious battle with little experience. You’ll never be completely ready for an attack but if you work on yourself emotionally, mentally, and physically. Going through my divorce was extremely tough, but thank god for people and books that got me through that tough period in life. I was attacked but I wasn’t captured and destroyed. I’m living my best life now two years later and I feel like I handle tougher challenges in life.
Life is not going to be all highs and no lows, there is going to be a mix but if you think about it, you want to have the highs and lows of life, because if your entire life was all highs, then how would you know if you truly have a great day. There is not a reference point to know how well you’re doing. Right now I’m living in Mexico and I’m seeing how people are living here and it makes me realize that I had it so good in the United States. I don’t have to worry about not flushing toilet paper down the toilet, there are a lot of trash cans that I can put my trash in, and I rarely don’t have to worry about hitting my head on something. There are some things that are amazing about Mexico that you can’t get in the United States like the metro system here in Mexico City costs only about 27 cents. So by living in Mexico City and not in a resort, I can get a different perspective on how to live life. When I go back to the United States, then I won’t have little inconveniences to take me down. I
If you look at people in the media who were attacked but not captured, just look at Alex Trebek, who was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and is taking it very stoically. He knows the end is near but is continuing to live his life to the best of his ability and being a good person at the same time. That is the way I want to go out, know that I did everything I could, doing what I loved, and just welcoming when my time comes. If you constantly allow life events to destroy you though, you won’t be able to live with your life with purpose and meaning and that’s not a way to live life.
That’s it for today’s episode, and to summarize it, we need to learn how to be attacked but not get captured. This is going to come from working on yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. This can come from learning from others and from getting battle scars yourself. Some of your best lessons will come from putting yourself in a vulnerable position where you might get beat up but then you realize that you didn’t get captured and things are not as bad as you think. It goes back to the saying where we don’t rise to our expectations, we fall to the level of our training, so if bad days are going to happen to us, might as well be prepared for them so that we don’t get destroyed by them and continue to live our great life.
So in your journal, ask yourself, can I handle setbacks in my life? Where can I go to get help on handling setbacks? Is it a book, going to a therapist, getting some coaching? Usually, if you’re unable to handle setbacks, there is an emotional component to it. You don’t have to handle it today, but just be aware that it is there and get the help that you need when the time is right. Taking this time to reflect is good for you and I hope it brings you the peace that you’re seeking.
Thanks for listening today! To get a free copy of my book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to get better every day” just go to my website growwithjoe.me/book and just pay for shipping and handling.
I have a quiz on my website that grades your inner circle, so if you want to find out if your inner circle is an A, B, C, D, or F, you can take that quiz at growwithjoe.me/quiz
I’m also trying to do a feedback Friday episode, so if you have a question that you would like to have my answer on the air, just e-mail me at [email protected]
I’m also on Instagram at Grow With Joe and Facebook just look up Grow With Joe
If you’re on ITunes, don’t forget to give me a five-star rating if you liked this episode.
Thanks for joining me today and remember if you go with Joe, you can grow with Joe, cause Joe knows Dough.
*Music outro
