Are You Antifragile?

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In this episode, we discuss the importance of being resilient in life. 

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Full Transcript

Hi Everyone, welcome to the You’re Daily Cup of Joe Podcast, with your host Joe Bautista, where my goal is to give you quick lessons on how to grow yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually so you can have better careers, better relationships, and better personal finances.
I’m also the author of the book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to Get Better Every Day”. In this book, I wrote down over 30 tips to help you grow in those four cornerstones.
In today’s episode we’re going to talk about the importance of building up your resilience. There is a great book by Nassim Taleb called Antifragile: Things that gain from disorder. This book is about how things can get stronger from when they grow through some sort of stress.
Think of your muscles. If you look at the individual muscle fibers they are weak, but as a group, they can be pretty strong and in order to get stronger, you need to break up those individual muscle fibers in order for them to grow back stronger.
If you look at the US economy, an individual business can be very fragile but as a collective, they can be very robust for the US economy.
Most people have heard of post-traumatic stress but there is anything called post-traumatic growth, you actually become stronger as an individual from going through that stressful period of time.
I remember when I was a Marine at my last duty it was very stressful. For my job in the Marines, which was supply, there are many different jobs that you can do so you could have spent your first four years in the Marine doing one job and not know much else.
So when I got to my last duty station, I had no clue what I was doing because I was put into a job where I had little experience, but what I always do, I try to learn as much as I can to do a good job. When I got to that duty station, they were talking about how they went through a congressional hearing because they were paying their bills on time and things were just a mess.
I looked at reports and they weren’t being properly reconciled and things weren’t being checked. Plus since I was at a reserve base, that meant there was little staff to handle every job description and we had to learn even more jobs. It was a lot of work and people were not getting along with each other. I was able to fix a lot of things at that place but I was miserable because I was overworked and there were some people that made my life miserable. I would complain every day pretty much on how that place sucked.
It did suck but I did gain a lot from that experience. I learned how to juggle ten different items at once, and really tighten up my time management skills. I learned how leadership is key to running a great office. And I learned what I didn’t want to do for the rest of my life as a 24-year-old. Plus I am so much grateful for doing what I am doing now instead of being locked up behind one of those desks.
So when things get tough now, I just reflect on that moment’s time and realize that things are not that bad and that I have the freedom to do whatever I want to in life. So if there is some little inconvenience, I’m not fazed by it. I don’t think I would be doing what I am doing now if things were easier during that period of my life. By going through that disorder and chaos, it made me a much stronger individual.
The key to making moments like that to get better is that you have to analyze what was causing the pain. Then there are three things you can do, you can address it, you can ignore it, or you can remove it from your life. I know that I’m not going to change the Marine Corps so I decided to ignore it for the rest of my enlistment and then I got out.
Then I told myself that I was never going to be in a situation like that for any longer than I have to be. This probably why I work so hard on growing with joe because I’m trying to create a business where I don’t have to work in an office environment and I like working one-on-one with people, so that’s why I like coaching. So when times are tough in this business with things taking longer than expected and things not working out, at least I can say I’m doing what I want to do in life.
I’m a big believer that you have to go through some discomfort in order to become a better person in life. A lot of the growth that I saw in my life is when I stepped out of my comfort zone and try something unknown to me. Every time I record a video or I do a speaking engagement, I’m nervous, but I know that if I continue to do them, I will get better and stronger from going through that discomfort.
I also know you can have stronger relationships but going through a difficult time and resolve it. Like a sports team that wins that championship or working on a project that everyone pitches in and wins the day. So you should embrace things as being difficult because that’s how you become better as an individual and have more empathy as a person. Tough things are going to come your way and if you’re a resilient person, you’ll handle them.
So to help you become more resilient, I feel like you just need to have a growth mindset, where you can grow in all environments and you don’t play a victim. Playing a victim is one of the worst things that we can do because that’s when we stop trying because we’re waiting for someone else to save us. The other way to become more resilient is to work on your emotional self. There is a great book by Amy Morin called 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do which is:

  • They don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves,
  • They don’t give away their power
  • They don’t shy away from change
  • They don’t waste energy on things they can’t control
  • They don’t worry about pleasing everyone
  • They don’t fear taking calculated risks
  • They don’t dwell on the past
  • They don’t make the same mistakes over and over
  • They don’t resent other people’s success
  • They don’t give up after the first failure
  • They don’t fear alone time
  • They don’t feel like the world owes them They don’t expect immediate results

Definitely check out this book because it will give you the right mindset to become more resilient. What really separates the great from the good, is having the right mindset and having one that is resilient will help you overcome any obstacle or problem that comes your way.
To summarize today’s episode, if you want to take your life to the next level, you’re going to need to learn how to become a resilient person and that is going to come from from a growth mindset and knowing the 13 things that mentally strong people don’t do, and to expect and want challenges because they will help you grow to new heights.
Thanks for listening to today’s episode.
To get a free copy of my book “More You Know, More You Grow: How to get better every day” just go to my website growwithjoe.me/book and just pay for shipping and handling.
I have a quiz on my website that grades your inner circle and you can take that quiz at growwithjoe.me/quiz
I’m also on Instagram at Grow With Joe and Facebook just look up Grow With Joe
If you’re on iTunes, don’t forget to give me a five-star rating if you liked this episode.
Thanks for joining me today and remember if you go with Joe, you can grow with Joe, cause Joe knows Dough.
*Music outro

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